Bob Dylan - Talking Bear Mountain Picnic Chords & Tabs

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From: "Jim and Sheryll Keane" 
Subject: d/dylan_bob/talking_bear_mountain_picnic.crd
Date: Tue, 3 Mar 1998 16:59:24 +1300

keane@sinesurf.co.nz

Talkin' Bear Mountain Picnic Massacre Blues
By Bob Dylan
from the Bootleg Albums

This hilarious talking blues is just a cycle of G, C, D chords
with sometimes the length of each chord varying depending
on the phrase and harmonica playing.

       G                C   
Well I saw it advertised one day that the 
D
Bear Mountain Picnic was coming my way,
G              C
Come along and take a trip
      D 
we'll bring you up there on a ship
          C                C                   D
bring the wife and family bring the whole kids - yippee!

Well I ran right down and bought a ticket to this thing called the 
Bear Mountain Picnic
Little did I realise I was in for a pleasant funny surprise -
It had nothing to do with picnics, didn't come close to a mountain
and I hate bears.

Took the wife and kids down to the pier, there was 6000 people there
and everybody had a ticket for the trip, I said "oh well
it's a pretty big ship". Besides anyway the more the merrier!
[ Tab from: https://www.guitartabs.cc/tabs/b/bob_dylan/talking_bear_mountain_picnic_crd.html ]
Well we all got on and what do you think, that big old boat started 
to sink. More people kept piling on and that old ship was going down -
funny way to start a picnic.

Well soon I lost track of my kids and my wife - so many people I never
saw in my life, that old ship started sinking down in the water
and those 6000 people were trying to kill each other. Dogs barking,
cats a-screaming, women a-yelling, men a-flying, fists a-flying, 
paper flying, cops a-comiing, me a-running - I think we'd better just 
call off the picnic.

I got shoved down and got pushed around all I remember was a moaning sound
Don't remember one thing more all I remember is waking up on the shore.
My arms and legs were broken, my feet were splintered, my head was cracked,
I couldn't walk, I couldn't talk, smell, feel, I couldn't see,
I didn't know where  I was, I was bald, quite lucky to be alive though.

Well feeling lucky I climbed out of my casket, I just grabbed back hold 
of my picnic basket, took the wife and kids and started home wishing I'd
never got up that morning. 

Now I don't care just what you do, if you want to have a picnic thats 
up to you, just don't tell me about it I don't want to hear it, you see
I just lost all of my picnic spirit.

I'll stay in my kitchen.
Have a picnic in my bathroom.

Well it don't seem to me quite so funny what some people are gonna 
do for money, there's a brand new gimmick every day, just to take
someones money away.

I think we oughta take some of these people, put 'em on a boat,
send 'em up to bear mountain for a picnic.

Submitted by Martin Keane, keane@sinesurf.co.nz